What Colors Our Perceptions of Dog Training & Ownership?

Our innate perceptions of the dog ownership world heavily influence choices like what trainers we work with, who we ask for advice, and how we approach certain situations — and they’re colored by so many things.

Here’s a deep dive into 1) where some of my personal gut reactions come from and 2) how I try to handle them productively. In order to live well with my dog, I need to consider how both emotion and logic affect my experience!

Our immediate environments

I’ve always lived in the United States, always in reasonably wealthy areas. I resided downtown in Wisconsin’s capital during college and enjoyed some time on rural property — but the vast majority of my experiences with dogs have taken place in the middle ground of medium-sized towns with predictable infrastructure.

When I imagine any dog-owner team, it’s natural to picture them in a similar environment to mine… and then interpret (and maybe even judge) their behavior accordingly.

A few examples:

• While it might be common, expected, and entirely appropriate for a farm dog to run all over their land unattended, that’s not something that goes over well where I live.
• It might be a necessity for a city dog to spend a lot of time heeling on a short leash, but it’s rarely a question of actual safety here.
• And so on.

Our immediate environments color the way we think about life with dogs, whether we mean for them to or not. I often have to remind myself that not everyone exists in the same sort of areas I do — and that dog training standards and methods vary for good reason depending on what’s practical in a given place!

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The cultures around us

Hand-in-hand with the physical worlds we inhabit, the intangible communities we surround ourselves with play a big role in our dog training perceptions, too.

Here are a few cultures that have influenced what I view as “normal” or “acceptable” dog-owner behavior over the years:

My family and neighborhood growing up

We lived a suburban life surrounded by mildly (sometimes severely) overweight dogs who were above all else just expected to be predictable family members. We rarely took our pets on outings beyond short walks — and any type of formal training was an afterthought at best.

Especially as a young kid, I trusted the adults around me! Had I grown up as the child of an ethical breeder, or perhaps the niece of a boots-on-the-ground rescue advocate, or in a family with no pets at all, my initial perceptions of life with dogs might have been quite different.

Online canine communities

Then when I first got more into the “dog world” online, I joined multiple Facebook groups and forums that discussed ownership and training.

Many of these promoted “balanced” training methods — and the admins showed off their seemingly happy, well-behaved pets! — so I naturally started to embody some of their values as my own the more I was exposed.

In-person connections

And as I’ve made deeper friendships with folks who are similarly invested in dogs — spending time in group classes, volunteering at our local shelter, FaceTiming with sports competitors and trainers — my perceptions have again shifted. The cliché that “we are who we hang out with” holds at least some water.

Cultural differences are real and valid

Basically, I think what’s common in our communities, both online and in the “real world”, often becomes our baseline expectation. It’s easy to forget how dramatic cultural differences can be both on a large scale (like between countries or world regions) and smaller spectrum (like between adjacent states or cities).

And just because something is different — because it doesn’t fit in our own current communities — doesn’t mean it’s inherently “wrong”. Some of Europe happily owns dogs without any use of crates. Villages like the one that hosted me in Thailand for two months after college have entirely different views of dogs altogether. The examples are endless.

The types of dogs we own and work with

And it’s not just the environments and communities we’re surrounded by that affect our gut reactions — it’s also the individual dogs we spend our time with.

Scout came to me as a timid creature who shut down easily. Her temperament heavily influenced how I thought about everything we did with her, and it’s naturally driven my feelings about what I see other people doing, too.

For example:

• I can have a pretty intense internal reaction when owners pull their dogs into on-leash greetings or hold them still for a stranger’s petting — because in our situation I think those things directly contributed to Scout’s reactivity and initial lack of trust in us.
• I’m sad when I see someone discouraging their dog from initiating a game at the park, because it took ages to build our cattle dog’s confidence and get her play system going in public places.
• And so on and so on.

Because my most salient experience with dogs has been with Scout, it’s easy for me to base my initial assumptions about the overall dog training world on her. She’s needed far more encouragement than boundaries, more enthusiasm than calm, more advocacy than “just letting her figure it out”.

And while I think many of those insights apply well to an across-the-board dogmanship philosophy, I also have to recognize that different canines have different needs and thrive with different things.

Our ideal lifestyles

A lot of life comes down to what we want, too — which is also influenced by everything mentioned above. (Connections everywhere, I swear! 😉)

Someone who dreams of going on challenging hikes multiple times a week is naturally going to prioritize different training skills (maybe off-leash reliability and recall) than someone who wants a coffee shop companion above all else (maybe they’ll focus on settling in public and being social with strangers).

Same for someone who rarely leaves their own property (maybe they have lovely acres out on a farm) versus someone who’s constantly in the thick of a city.

On and on and on.

Plus, different people enjoy different behaviors. I find certain traits adorable (like Scout’s tendency to press her chin on my lap while I’m eating) that other owners find annoying — and vice versa!

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Who we see with the kind of dogs we dream of owning

One of the reasons I so quickly considered myself part of the “balanced” community after adopting Scout? I really admired the pets I saw owned by other people who grouped themselves under that label.

I had dreams of an “everywhere” dog who was incredibly stable in all environments. A dog I could “show off” in public and feel really proud to own. When I saw trainers or fellow owners with companions who seemed to fit the bill, I naturally wanted to do what they were doing!

Of course, my thoughts on everywhere dogs have since changed — not to mention the fact that many of the pets I saw actually weren’t feeling comfortable (despite looking so polite). As I’ve learned more about canines and considered my larger dogmanship philosophy, my goals have evolved.

(If I absolutely had to pick a label, I’d still say “balanced” — but my current perceptions aren’t the same as they once were. Another good reminder that not only do our perceptions come from many different places, they also shift over time!)

Ultimately we all bring our personal associations to the table

Each of us carries our past experiences as we move through the world — especially when those experiences are emotional. We can learn to be logical about them, to process them, to move forward productively. But we can’t just shut off their influence.

I try to remember that when something rubs me the wrong way.

Of course there are things I don’t think are okay to do with any dog, like outright abuse, deprivation of basic needs, completely leaving them in the deep end when they’re scared, and so on. (It’s a long list and I hope most of it’s obvious.)

But there are also things I wouldn’t do with Scout that might be perfectly reasonable for someone else to do with their dog who’s different than her, like:

• Letting an off-leash dog say hello instead of keeping it away, depending on the context
• Having them hold a command while people touch them
• Asking them to settle in a very crowded or loud area
• And so on

Asking questions beats judgment, every time

At the end of the day, the lens with which I view dog ownership depends on a lot of things specific to our situation, our little corner of this planet, our goals… and your lens is probably a bit different!

Asking questions about those differences and where they come from is a lot more enjoyable — not to mention productive, for both us and our dogs! — than sitting in judgment.

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